Saturday, July 30, 2011

I Don't Get It

Some days I feel the emotion is there, but other days I feel abandoned and let down. I do my best to give it my best at all times and it doesn't seem to make a difference, at least from my point view. Call me wrong or a liar, but these are simply my honest thoughts and feelings to the current state of affairs. Sometimes the void between feels cold, distant, and indifferent. In fact, some days I wake up very confused that I just want to throw in the towel. But that little voice inside my head won't let me rest, won't let me give up without a good fight. And I always wonder, how did it get to this? I reminisce about the days before hearts broke over disappointment. Oh how those were the happiest of times! Where are those smiles? those hugs? those emotions? that affection? A wise person once told me that we can't go back to what we were, but that we can only move forward. I want to move forward, but if that's not possible, then I must set you free like the butterfly, "Spread your wings and prepare to fly, for you have become a butterfly, fly abandonedly into the sun, if you should return to me, we truly were meant to be, so spread your wings and fly BUTTERFLY." So what's it going to be? THAT IS THE QUESTION.

Blog Readers! :)

To my fellow Blog Readers:

I have not forgotten about you! LoL! I have some blogs to post, just have not had the chance to post any recently. Now that I'm back in California, I will definitely have more time to post my thoughts and words of inspiration. Thank you for following along faithfully and for checking in often to see if I have posted a thought or two. Sending you lots of love, hugs, and positive energy your way!

God Bless America!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Always CAPTIVATING

Today I decided to take my iPod out of the shadows and listen to the beats being hummed into my ears. As I sit here and wait, many of the songs bring back memories of love, friendship, and independence. It's a blessing to know I am loved and that I am able to share my love and passion with everyone around me. For example, "Dreaming of You" reminds me of the ways I can fall asleep and dream about being embraced, loved, and cherished by the one I love. Then there is another song that empowers women by deconstructing all those stereotypes about women. The song is called "Yo No Soy Esa Mujer" ("I'm not that Woman"). In the song, the artist Paulina Rubio describes herself as being that girl that is not going to stop being herself just because you told her to. She's not going to stop being the woman she is just because you are a man. After listening to the song, I felt empowered and told myself to follow my dreams no matter the cost. But then "Bleeding Love" reminded me of the heartbreak I will experience in doing so. It's important to be strong, while at the same time recognizing and embracing my weaknesses. I used to think my tears were my biggest weakness, but I have come to embrace them as my strength. Through my tears I cleanse my soul of my biggest fears, my anguish, and my pain. Then again, I also share immense joy, love, and happiness through my tears. With or without a broken heart I will always be bleeding love. In fact, I look up to the one I aspire to be like, JESUS. Only he hasn't let me down and he's the one who truly embraces me for who I am and pushes me to go for it, to fulfill my purpose and mission in life. It's no wonder why after "Bleeding Love" Jesus reminded me that he will always be there to mend the broken pieces through the song "Your Love is Extravagant." He has definitely CAPTIVATED my heart. I'm in love with those that have made a positive impact in my life, but I am most in love with the one that always CAPTIVATES my heart, OFFERS me an intimate friendship, and FORGIVES my sins - JESUS. My heart jumps for joy because "It's Always Been You" Jesus. I love because he loved us. So today my friend I want to remind you that YOU'RE WORTH IT and that you're always CAPTIVATING. Have a blessed day everyone!

"What matters to you in life? Are you spending your valuable time in what matters? Do not follow someone else's dreams, don't just wander through life, and don't just go with society's flow. You were meant for more. Do everything with a purpose of your own... Clearly define where you want to go in life." -Jorge Raziel Ortiz, FB Post 7/8/11

Song Credits:
  1. "Dreaming of You" - Selena
  2. "Yo No Soy Esa Mujer" - Paulina Rubio
  3. "Bleeding Love" - Leona Lewis
  4. "Your Love is Extravagant" - Casting Crowns
  5. "It's Always Been You" - Chris August

Inside the School of Education at the University of Michigan - Ann Arbor

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Flexibility At Its Best

Writing in my blog while working has not been so easy. I mean, there is only so much free time I have. As much as I would have loved to write everyday, I can't. Work has been crazy, but totally worthwhile. This is where flexibility matters. Even though there's a schedule and we should stick to it, we can't for the reason that some unforeseen circumstance always comes up. We should always remember to be flexible in every situation. For some of us this is the biggest challenge we'll face. As much as we like structure, sometimes it's not possible to keep up with the latest trends. I mean, we're only human. However, flexibility tests our character and helps us grow and mature. Today I definitely lost my mind because I was impatient and refused to be flexible. I even cried. But what is the point of complaining? When I stop and reflect on all that I'm surrounded by, I realize how blessed I really am. In our bouts of complaints and frustration, it is easy to forget how much we have to be grateful for. While we cannot control everything in our lives, we can definitely take initiative to change our lives in a more positive direction. The following quote definitely resonates in our lives: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." Sometimes we need things like this to remind us of our purpose in life. Let's continue living up to our purpose. God bless your night!

Sunday, July 3, 2011

CHAOS!

Crazyness & Havoc in the midst of Awesomeness full of Outrageous Screams

That seems to best describe my life for the next few weeks. As someone described it, "It's the toughest job you'll ever have that you'll love." I am very confident in my abilities to give it my best shot, but I still can't help feeling a little scared. I'm sure once the madness begins, it will all settle down and before you know it, I'll be packing my bags to fly home. It has been one chaotic week filled with lots of memories from the experiences I have had so far. Washington DC is amazing and I look forward to exploring the city as much as I can during my free time. At this time I feel very blessed with the opportunity I have been given. I hope and pray that I make the most of it. On another note, I am glad I don't miss home as much as I thought I would! LoL! I definitely miss everyone, but this is definitely going to be a great summer. Take care and God bless! Love you all and see you at home in 20 days! :)